Smile Politely

The battle rages on

It’s been a while since I wrote about the struggle between getting fit and getting lit. Now is as good a time as any to reflect on the process, especially since the battle was in full swing during August Super Happy Fun Party Month.

What is August Super Happy Fun Party Month, you ask? Well, two and half years ago my hubby (then fiancé, or Beyonce, as I liked to call him) and I thought it would be a swell idea to squish a wedding between our two birthdays that fall in August, making August from then on our Super Happy Fun Party Month. Turns out this is also an equation for Super Broke Month and Super Burnout Month.

Super Happy Fun Party Month was capped off on Saturday night with my Golden Birthday — 29 on August 29. I woke up in a horrible mood that day. Something about that age that morning really irked me. I woke up thinking, this could be the last birthday of debauchery! Before you know it, my 30s will be here and I will have to start getting serious about building my retirement account!

While I highly doubt that I will instantly metamorphose into a wise and sober butterfly when I turn 30, I partied it up on my Saturday like it was the last birthday where I could really appropriately party it up. I tried to work out a calorie deficit in preparation for the great birthday booze calorie intake by gardening and playing badminton with friends during the day before going out. I tried to make low-cal choices at dinner, so I opted for the sautéed mushrooms on the Radio Maria tapas menu. Holy crap, those are the best mushrooms on this planet.

As I am wont to give in to my desires whence I am enveloped in inebriation, I found myself ending my birthday eating fried veggie potstickers at the Esquire. I’ve managed to stay away from the late night La Bambas, Taco Bell, and Jimmy John’s for the past few months, but now I have another fatty demon to battle! Oh potstickers, you delightful fried pillows of wonder… Let me dip you or let me eat you plain!

With my birthday over, I did my best to get back on my healthy horse. I have joined a highly addictive free dieting and fitness website called SparkPeople, where I keep track of how many calories I eat and how many calories I burn every day. I got on SparkPeople after my birthday and did my best to recall everything that I ate and drank the night before so that I could get a calorie count, and see how many hours I needed to spend at the ARC, on the tennis court, playing badminton, etc. I did some web searching to see how different beers I tried stacked up as far as calories go. Holy fazoli, the Bells Two Hearted Ale that I had been drinking all night — 202 calories for a 12 oz, nevermind that I had at least 3 pints of that and… well, I don’t want to bore you with everything else that I drank.

Despite the Super Happy Fun Party Month festivities, it has seemed that getting fit has prevailed over getting lit, as I have lost seven pounds since the last time we checked in. I feel like I am getting stronger (cue the Rocky music) and my outlook on life has improved. Some of my friends have expressed concern that my new healthy lifestyle goals mean that I am “changing.” To them I say, don’t worry — I will still have the same happy bundle of neuroses and self-deprecating sense of humor, even if I do have a tighter ass.

P.S. Today I googled calories in my once favorite beer, Three Floyds Alpha King, out of curiosity: 225 in 12oz! Baaah! I am training my taste buds to enjoy MGD 64.

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