Smile Politely

Opinion

How to build your own Bible

The Bible as you know it is simply a fabrication of generations from a different era. We’re missing out on a lot of relevant writing. Your Humble Heretic details what it is exactly.

The Fair and why I fear it

Now that the Fair has come and gone, Caleb questions himself on his decision to remain fair-free after a youth filled with cotton candy-filled fantasies played out in real life.

Quiet in Lincolnland

If being a member of a community means having to “love it or leave it,” then Rob wants no part of it — and he’s staying.

Cool, cool summer

It’s been more than mild this summer, and T. McDade couldn’t be happier: his air conditioning has stayed idle for most of the season.

Sexagenarian, at last!

Is 60 the new 40?  P. Gregory finds his life has been more fulfilled — in a manner of speaking — than Lincoln’s, King’s or Rock Hudson’s.

Sotomayania!

When Obama nominated Sonia Sotomayor to serve on the Supreme Court, the right-wing picked up on anything they could to try to keep her off. Caleb thinks it wasn’t “wise.”

All choked up

Dan is happy to report that he did not cry at the latest Harry Potter movie.  However, he does admit this is unusual, and chronicles his descent into being a complete sap.

Hegemony is healthy

Cultural hegemony is sweeping the nation, and the time has come to evolve from what we are to what we should be. Rob McColley explains it all.

Race row, indeed

Dan takes exception to Rob’s characterization of cultural houses at the University of Illinois.

Big Brother victorious!

Armed with his camera, Rob heads to campus to find out where the cameras are, in case anyone wants to use them to enforce the law.

Risking it

“Hey, mister. You got two dollars?” and “Spare anything?” … we’ve all heard these questions.

The time of the Signs

There is perfectly good legal defense over the case of the stolen signs, says Rob. But that might not jibe with the local anti-Chief population who wants more than a misdemeanor theft for this one.

Outing the dead

In a week when the famous made headlines in death, P. Gregory remembers a friend who passed away, buried alive in the closet.

A queer notion

Acceptance and fair play are what one might assume coming out means within the LGBTQ community. Surprises and disappointment, however, abound.

My wrist has a heartbeat, too

Jon Stewart cowered like only a Democrat in power can last week when a plump Mike Huckabee came to see him to discuss America’s truly great debate: when do we become people?

The Utilitarian case for higher taxes

The next time you think about your good fortune from living in a stable city during the recession, think a bit more about how and why we got here. It’s not just the decent beers in downtown bars.

Bury the funeral procession

When we honor our deceased, why do we find it necessary to inconvenience others? Rob intimates that it’s part of a larger problem in our society.

Loud fast rules

Don’t love Harley-Davidson? Why not just burn a flag, kill a soldier, and spit on the Constitution? Rob reports on the worst of the worst of the worst of noise pollution.

Being Anti-where

Now that we have a “peacemaker” in office, it seems like the anti-war movement has lost steam. Tony questions why we’re still in this mess.

No Ivy for SCOTUS

It’s time for President Obama to pick a new Supreme Court Justice. Rob makes a few suggestions, but one in particular: no Ivy. No way. No how.